Mary Alexander

With a contagious zest for life coupled with unconditional love, Mary Alexander was a blessing to all who were within her reach. She was uncommonly genuine, graciously honest, and eternally positive with the ability to take even the most ordinary of days and turn them into something extraordinary. With the love of her life by her side for nearly 35 years, Mary viewed being a wife and mother as the greatest reward of her life. Deeply devoted to the community she loved, there was no one who met Mary and left unchanged. She will be deeply missed while her timeless legacy is carried on by those who follow in her footsteps.

It was on May 8, 1954, that Donald J. and Joyce (Irish) McKay announced the birth of their daughter, Mary. She was the third of eight children in her family and had the most beautiful red hair and bright blue eyes. Although she was born in Cadillac, Michigan, she then moved to Escanaba and a few other places throughout Michigan before settling in Bangor, which she considered to be her hometown. Mary’s father was an attorney while her mother was a busy mother who raised Mary and her seven siblings, John, Kathy, Ann, David, Beth, Scott, and Doug.

Mary was primarily Irish, or as her grandfather would say, “A little bit of everything, not very much of anything.” Mary enjoyed things like long nature walks, blueberry picking, studying sign language, and singing as she grew up in a family of singers. Her siblings saw her as the sister who was good at everything, and she was particularly talented at basket making and quilting. With two close friends who were also named Mary she was part of “the three Marys” who would remain lifelong friends. The McKay family was very close and could often be found together whether playing board games, singing, or just living life. Mary and her family suffered a great loss when her father died in the summer of 1971. She attended Sacred Heart School through the eighth grade and went on to Bangor High School and also worked as a waitress at Wally’s Country Kitchen and did some babysitting while a high school student.

After graduating from high school in 1972, Mary went on to Bronson School of Nursing where she met her dear friend, Kim. After graduating with her associate’s degree in nursing, Mary and Kim moved to Maine where they worked as nurses. Mary then moved to Alabama driving her beloved Trans Am before finally settling in Michigan.

Life was forever changed for Mary when she met her husband-to-be while working as a registered nurse. His name was Robert Alexander, and he was in medical school and doing his rotation at the hospital where she worked, and they were also on a volleyball team together. Mary was drawn to his high energy and social nature while he was attracted to her heavenly blue eyes and zest for life. She helped him study for all his exams and supported him during medical school. Deeply in love, they were married on April 18, 1981, at Stetson Chapel at Kalamazoo College.

Together Mary and Bob were blessed with the births of two children, Amanda and Robert. Both Mary and Bob were deeply devoted to their family and supported one another in their careers as well. They also visited extended family all around the country and hosted family reunions. Mary was a nurturing and supportive mother who encouraged her children in their passions. She instilled within them the value of education and the importance of being kind, open minded, and hardworking. Mary also was actively involved in their schools, and her children learned to have open hearts and open hands to give to others by observing the way she lived her life.

In addition to caring for her family, Mary took great pride in her career as a dedicated medical professional for over 38 years. It was easy to see that she truly loved being able to help those in need. While raising two small children, Mary worked 12-hour overnight shifts, which allowed her to be there for her children during the day. She was well respected at Borgess and known for being especially warm and non-judgmental while treating everyone with dignity and kindness. She held a number of positions including charge nurse for the cardiac care unit at Bronson Hospital in Kalamazoo and in the emergency room at Pipp Community Hospital. Most recently, Mary was the clinical specialist at Borgess Family Medicine and retired in 2012. She established and coordinated the health fair at Borgess Family Medicine, which served the Plainwell community and helped rural and low-income residents gain access to immunizations and health information.

Mary enriched her journey in numerous ways. She loved nature, particularly birds and flowers as she always had bird feeders and enjoyed jewelry that reflected nature as well. Mary was a gifted quilter, made both baskets and stained glass, and was a voracious reader who shared many of her favorite titles with her sisters and friends. Her free-spirited passion for travel remained with her throughout her entire journey as she visited France with her daughter, went backpacking through Europe with her friend Kim, Ireland with her sister Beth, and traveled to Boston, New York, Alaska, California, Key West, and Mexico. Mary also loved hearing about other’s travels.

All who knew Mary would agree that she was extraordinary. She was the heartbeat of wherever she was and emanated positivity, generosity, and uncompromising poise. Mary was known for her laugh and smile, and she was ahead of the curve on everything. She had great taste in all things—pottery, jewelry, furniture, fabric, home decorating, cars that were fun to drive, good music, quality books, and so much more.

When reflecting on the life of Mary Alexander, words such as gentle, kind, and loving come to mind, however, perhaps the word that describes her best is beautiful. She had an amazing sense of humor, a passion for the glory of the world around her, and a love for all who were near. Mary poured her heart into caring for her husband and children and was so proud of the people her children had become. Her love, her lively spirit, and her gracious touch will never be forgotten.

Mary McKay Alexander of Plainwell, died on September 15, 2014. Mary’s family includes her two children, Amanda Alexander and Robert Alexander II; husband, Dr. Robert Alexander; mother, Joyce McKay Emery; seven siblings, John, Kathy, Ann, David, Beth, Scott, and Doug; eight step-siblings; and her many cousins, nieces, and nephews. Mary was preceded in death by her brother, David, her father Donald J. McKay, and step-father John Emery. Following her wishes, cremation will take place. A Celebration of Life Memorial Gathering will be held on Saturday, September 20 at 1:00 p.m. at Lifestory Funeral Home Plainwell; 120 S. Woodhams Street. A Memorial Service will follow at 2:00 p.m. at the same location. The family plans to have an internment at St. Mary’s Cemetery in Hemlock, MI on Sunday, September 21. In lieu of flowers donations can be made in Mary’s honor to Partners in Health (www.pih.org), an organization that shared her commitment to providing healthcare for the underserved. Please visit Mary’s memory page at www.lifestorynet.com and add your thoughts and wishes to her memory book.